


The Fires of Kahloom

by Cheree_Cargill



Category: Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: Fluff and Humor, Food, Friendship, Gen, Vulcan Culture, Vulcan holiday
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-09-20
Updated: 2020-09-20
Packaged: 2021-03-07 22:20:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 877
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26565004
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cheree_Cargill/pseuds/Cheree_Cargill
Summary: It's a Vulcan holiday called "Kahloom" and Spock has invited Kirk to partake of traditional foods at his home on Vulcan.  Kirk doesn't know what he's in for.
Relationships: James T. Kirk & Spock
Comments: 2
Kudos: 10





	The Fires of Kahloom

**Author's Note:**

> DISCLAIMER: The Star Trek characters are the property of Paramount Studios, Inc. The story contents are the creation and property of Cheree Cargill and is copyright (c) 2020 by Cheree Cargill. This story is Rated G.
> 
> This is a rework of a story I did called "Hotter Than Vulcan" with the main characters being Spock and Christine Chapel. This one was published in the fanzine "Grimmoire #5", 2020, edited by Ann Wortham, Ashton Press.

"This is awfully nice of you, Spock, but you really didn't have to go to all this trouble," Jim Kirk smiled as he sat down at the stone table on the terrace of the small home Spock maintained in ShiKahr. The Vulcan had come home on leave to attend to some personal business while the _Enterprise_ underwent repairs in dry dock and he had invited Kirk to accompany him.

"It is no trouble, I assure you," Spock answered, working diligently over the flame in the cooking pit that every Vulcan household seemed to have. "We happened to arrive during the Festival of _Kah-loom_ and it is only fitting that we observe it with traditional ceremonies and foods." At last he seemed to have the fire at the level he wanted and laid a large, flat cooking sheet over the supports above it.

"I never imagined that Vulcans had backyard barbecues. Are you sure there isn't something you'd like me to do?" Kirk asked, taking a swig of his beer. "Throw on some hot dogs? Make potato salad? Ice down a watermelon?"

Spock turned and leveled a reproving, incredulous stare at his friend. "That is hardly appropriate, Captain."

"Sorry," Kirk said. "This just seems like the Fourth of July to me."

"What is that?" Spock asked, turning back and beginning to lay out a variety of strange looking vegetables on the cooking stone.

"An old Earth holiday. The area of North America where I grew up is part of the United States of America and the holiday celebrates the day America declared its independence from England."

"Ah, yes, part of your ancient history," Spock replied, liberally applying spices and seasonings to the sizzling vegetables he was tending. "My mother used to speak of it. She is from Boston where the revolution began, if I'm correct."

"Pretty much. What are you putting on those things?" Kirk inquired. The pungent odor of the vegetables was beginning to tickle his nose.

"Vulcan seasonings traditional for _Kah-loom_." He threw on another handful of what looked like black peppercorns and oregano, sending up a puff of steam from the grill. " _Kah-loom_ celebrates the end of a major war 2,000 years ago. Surak's successor, Steyn, negotiated the end of it and it was the last conflict of its size ever waged on Vulcan. Tradition has it that a meal of this sort was served."

"Well, it smells good anyway," Kirk responded.

Spock began scooping the vegetables off the grill with what looked like a spatula and heaping them onto an ornate serving dish. There were a lot of them in all different colors. "I am pleased that you think so," the Vulcan smiled, setting the platter down before his commanding officer. "Because the meal is served."

He seated himself across from Kirk and took a smaller dish, filling it with the aromatic vegetables and handing it over to Jim before filling a similar one for himself. "You use the tongs there much like chopsticks," he instructed, taking up his own. Kirk still looked puzzled so Spock demonstrated, catching up a green zucchini like vegetable and conveying it to his mouth.

It must have been absolutely delicious because he inadvertently closed his eyes for a second as the flavors of the vegetable melted against his tongue. Kirk mentally shrugged and dug in, pondering the fact that, of all the things he'd ever imagined Spock being able to do, cooking wasn't one of them.

The Human managed to get a large helping of his food into his mouth and began to chew. The flavors were a little strange, but absolutely terrific! He gazed in admiration at Spock, who had set about eating as if it were the best thing he'd ever tasted.

Kirk chewed a couple of more times and then began to be aware of a strange tingling sensation on his tongue. Another second and the tingling had turned to burning. And then he felt like his entire head was bursting into flame!

His first impulse was to spit out the mouthful of fiery food, but he knew that he could never be so rude to Spock, so he hastily swallowed it, the inferno following the food down his throat and into his stomach. Kirk had eaten habaneros, Thai peppers, and had even tried ghost peppers and Carolina reapers. Nothing compared to this!

Frantically, he snatched up his beer bottle and chugged it down without coming up for air. When he had finished it, he grabbed the large pitcher of ice water on the table and upended that as well.

Kirk was almost exhaling steam by the time he finally got the fire doused. As he set down the pitcher, his face red and drenched with sweat, he became aware that Spock was staring at him in open amazement, his mouth actually hanging open in shock.

"Jim!" he finally managed to say. "Water is a precious commodity on Vulcan! That was meant to last both of us through the entire meal!"

"I'm sorry, Spock," the captain panted. "I really am. But I've never eaten anything so hot in my life! That stuff nearly took the top of my head off!"

"Naturally," Spock answered in perfect innocence. "That's what _Kah-loom_ means. 'Hot food'!"

THE END


End file.
